Movies I've seen in 2011

Movies I've seen in 2011


1. Battlefield Earth (2000) *
-Watching everything at an angle really messes with your head after a while.

2. Cool As Ice (1991) *
-A Vanilla Ice movie is just as horrible as you think it is.

3. Waxwork II: Lost in Time (1992) *1/2
-The five minute sequence with Bruce Campbell is pretty funny.

4. Buried (2010) **1/2
-Proves that Ryan Reynolds can really act and carry a whole movie completely on his own, but not a movie I could ever re-watch.

5. From Paris With Love (2010) **
-I really only remember the Pulp Fiction references and how weird John Travolta looks.

6. Trick 'R Treat (2007) ***1/2
-Fun horror anthology movie in the vein of Creepshow.

7. Zombieland (2009) **
-Bill Murray is so awesome that he gives this a whole extra star.

8. Triangle (2009) ***
-Time hasn't made less sense since Donnie Darko!

9. Legion (2010) *
-Also known as the worst season of Supernatural with horrible actors and Dennis Quaid.

10. Moon (2009) ***1/2
-A great sci-fi drama that really captures the loneliness of space with the only star being the awesome Sam Rockwell.

11. Pumpkinhead II: Blood Wings (1994) *1/2
-Plus half a star for having Punky Brewster and Bill Clinton's brother in the same movie.

12. Leprechaun (1993) **
-Before The Hood, before Space, and before returning to The Hood, there was just Leprechaun; it was okay.

13. Wishmaster (1997) **1/2
-Pretty solid monster B-movie; best one on the 4-pack DVD at least.

14. Wishmaster II: Evil Never Dies (1999) *1/2
-Did you enjoy the first one? Because this one is the same thing.

15. Slither (2006) ****
-Nathan Fillion vs. Space Slugs!

16. Take Me Home Tonight (2011) ***
-Right out of the 90s, pretending to be out of the 80s; wouldn't feel out of place beside Can't Hardly Wait. But get Not-Not-Not Jack Black out of there.

17. The Last Exorcism (2010) ***
-Though only one sequence is genuinely frightening, this probably is the best of the faux-documentaries lately.

18. The Social Network (2010) *****
-Smart but never so much so that it loses you; great cast, writing, acting, directing; the whole shebang.

19. Easy A (2010) ****
-A fun take on The Scarlet Letter mixed with an extreme throwback to 80s John Hughes movies.

20. 127 Hours (2010) **1/2
-The James Franco Show! He's great; but not an interesting enough movie for another viewing.

21. Mars Attacks! (1996) **1/2
-What a mean movie; maybe Tim Burton's last decent one.

22. The Squid and the Whale (2005) **1/2
-Hard to watch but Jeff Daniels and Jesse Eisenberg steal the show.

23. Splice (2009) *1/2
-Great premise ruined by horribly written characters, a lack of anything frightening, and overuse of CGI.

24. MacGruber (2010) *
-Watch the first three minutes and turn it off; those are the funny parts.

25. Dogma (1999) ***
-Interesting take on Catholicism; kind of surreal seeing Jay and Silent Bob fighting angels.

26. Birdemic (2008) *
-This is probably the funniest bad movie made since The Room. Surely it was on purpose.

27. Black Swan (2010) ***1/2
-A dark, surreal movie that actually becomes quite frightening at times.

28. Scream 4 (2011) ****1/2
-Just a great fun throwback to the originals while making some fun commentary on horror remakes.

29. The Last Unicorn (1982) *
-Awesome soundtrack, but I feel sorry for anyone who saw this as a kid.

30. Night of the Demons (1988) **
-Tries to be Evil Dead 2 but doesn't have the talent to back it up.

31. The Fly (1986) ***1/2
-Just a tragic, disgusting remake of a cheesy 50s B-movie. It's great.

32. Breathing Fire (1991) *
-In the $1 bin at Wal-Mart; that should speak for it's quality.

33. Dragon Wars (2007) *
-The most needlessly confusing movie about dragons vs. humans ever.

34. X-Men: First Class (2011) *1/2
-How did they make this so laughably bad? How did they make a movie worse than X-Men: The Last Stand?!

35. My Bloody Valentine 3D (2009) *1/2
-Whoever says horror is dead probably watched My Bloody Valentine 3D.

36. Green Lantern (2011) ***
-Most fun superhero movie since Spider-Man 3. Somehow that sounds like a joke but it isn't.

37. Transformers: Dark of the Moon (2011) ***
-Pretty fun movie if you don't think about it.

38. Leonard Part 6 (1987) *
-You would think a movie about Bill Cosby killing vegans with meat and riding an ostrich would be awesome. Nope.

39. Insidious (2010) ***1/2
-A legitimately scary movie that only briefly travels into too over-the-top territory. Best at night, with headphones.

40. Harry Potter and the Deathly Hallows Part 2 (2011) **1/2
-A disappointing, generic action-fest of a conclusion to a very solid first part.

41. The Fighter (2010) **1/2
-Oscar-bait; just do yourself a favor and watch Rocky instead.

42. The Legend of Bloody Jack (2007) *
-Can production values be less than zero?

43. Rise of the Planet of the Apes (2011) ***
-Starring CGI with a special appearance from James Franco!

44. Super (2011) *****
-Funny, tragic, sharp, philosophical, beautiful. Just watch it. Best movie of the year.

45. Planet of the Apes (2001) *
-Tim Burton at his worst, making the worst movie he possibly can.

46. 30 Minutes or Less (2011) *
-I hope Danny McBride and Nick Swardson stop "acting".

47. Don't Be Afraid of the Dark (2011) **1/2
-A visually interesting movie ruined by terrible looking, unfrightening CGI creatures.

48. A Nightmare on Elm Street (1984) *****
-An imaginative look at nightmares with a great heroine and super 80s synthy soundtrack.

49. A Nightmare on Elm Street 2: Freddy's Revenge (1985) **
-Okay guys, let's take everything that worked about the first one and toss it.

50. A Nightmare on Elm Street 3: Dream Warriors (1987) ****
-Okay, bring the great heroine back and add some much-needed comedy.

51. A Nightmare on Elm Street 4: The Dream Master (1988) ***1/2
-One image can sum up this movie: Freddy wearing sunglasses on the beach.

52. A Nightmare on Elm Street 5: The Dream Child (1989) ***
-Tries to be both funny and dark but doesn't quite work as well as it should.

53. Freddy's Dead: The Final Nightmare (1991) **
-Complete comedy; Freddy's Dead, indeed.

54. New Nightmare (1994) ****
-A strange but excellent take on the power of film's influence; works particularly well as a great spin-off of the original film.

55. Freddy Vs. Jason (2003) **1/2
-Exactly what you think it is.

56. Never Sleep Again: The Elm Street Legacy (2010) ****
-Great documentary on the entire Nightmare series full of interesting stories and hardships.

57. A Nightmare on Elm Street (2010) **
-Needless remake that dumps the good soundtrack, surreal dreamworld, and great heroine in favor of reproducing scenes from the original with horrible CGI.

58. Happythankyoumoreplease (2010) ***
-Pretty good indie movie, lifted by the writing, direction, and star power of Josh Radnor.

59. Knowing (2009) **
-Disaster movie with a weird and pointless twist; can't even be saved by Nicolas Cage.

60. Dungeons and Dragons (2000) *
-Horrible and embarrassing for everyone involved. Makes me want to watch Susie Q.

61. The Island of Dr. Moreau (1996) *1/2
-Basically the 2001 Planet of the Apes, five years early.

62. Pan's Labyrinth (2006) **1/2
-Interesting concept that isn't properly fleshed out and a stupid cartoonishly evil villain.

63. Friday the 13th (1980) **1/2
-A few good moments, but mostly what you expect it to be.

64. Friday the 13th Part 2 (1981) **
-More of the same.

65. Friday the 13th Part 3 (1982) **
-Even more of the same.

66. Friday the 13th Part 4: The Final Chapter (1984) ***
-More of the same but incorporating more mythos and a great protagonist in Tommy Jarvis.

67. Friday the 13th Part 5: A New Beginning (1985) **
-Interesting because Jason isn't even in it; pretty dull otherwise.

68. Jason Lives: Friday the 13th Part 6 (1986) ***
-Started the Jason "zombie-killer" idea and concludes the Tommy Jarvis story with more of a parody style.

69. Friday the 13th Part 7: The New Blood (1988) *1/2
-More of the same; without a likable hero, it's getting old.

70. Friday the 13th Part 8: Jason Takes Manhattan (1989) *
-More of the same...except it's on a boat. And worse.

71. Jason Goes to Hell: The Final Friday (1993) ***
-Weird explanation for Jason's powers but it's an interesting Body Snatchers kind of movie.

72. Jason X (2001) ***
-Embraces the silliness of the series and runs with it all the way to space, to much success.

73. His Name Was Jason (2009) **
-Pretty mediocre documentary on the Friday series that fails to give much insight.

74. Friday the 13th (2009) **
-A pretty solid movie if you take out all the idiot characters; all in all, faithful to the originals.

75. Airheads (1994) **
-Interesting because it invented the Clydesdale scale.

76. Pinocchio's Revenge (1996) *1/2
-Actually way too serious for it's own good, and really not what you think it is.

77. The Twilight Saga: New Moon (2009) *1/2
-Pretty boring despite a couple hilariously bad moments.

78. Saw IV (2007) *
-Violence without any sort of interesting plot.

79. Saw V (2008) **
-More interesting this time, spends less time on violence, and focuses more on story, with a likable lead.

80. Saw VI (2009) *1/2
-The main game is just cruel for the sake of being cruel.

81. Saw 3D (2010) **1/2
-All in all a decent conclusion to a series that has been mostly terrible since the first installment.

82. Wet Hot American Summer (2001) ****
-Hilarious parody of summer camp movies and rom-coms in general.

83. It (1990) **1/2
-Not bad for a Stephen King miniseries; three hours is a long time though.

84. The Crazies (2010) **
-If you've seen any good zombie movie, don't bother.

85. Dragonball Evolution (2009) *
-The answer to "Can we make a big budget epic with no budget at all".

86. Tremors (1990) **1/2
-Need to pay more attention next time.

87. My Soul to Take (2010) *
-This has got to be a joke. Wes Craven, tell me it's a joke.

88. Real Steel (2011) ***1/2
-Rocky Sock'em Robots!

89. Jack Frost 2 (2000) *
-Maybe the least entertaining movie ever made.

90. The Mangler 2 (2002) *
-Nevermind.

91. Dream House (2011) ***
-Solid mystery movie with an interesting twist and a good performance by Daniel Craig.

92. Space Chimps (2008) *
-How is this movie four hours long? Oh, it's only an hour and a half.

93. Ju-on 2 (2003) *1/2
-I thought Japanese horrors were supposed to be scary.

94. The Thing (2011) **1/2
-Pretty much the original minus the atmosphere and great practical effects.

95. The Box (2009) *1/2
-A weird, dumb, confusing, parody(?) of the old Twilight Zone style with a really overbearing score by Arcade Fire.

96. Paranormal Activity 3 (2011) ***1/2
-Not as many outright scares as the first two but it makes up for it in suspense and more likable characters.

97. The Blair Witch Project (1999) **
-Not as effective as I thought it would be.

98. One Missed Call (2003) **
-Far more confusing and meandering than Audition, without that disturbing factor that made it awesome.

99. Hellraiser (1987) ***
-The epitome of what 80s horror special effects should look like.

100. Jennifer's Body (2009) ***
-Megan Fox is pretty bad but it's a pretty entertaining movie that doesn't take itself seriously.

101. The Muppets (2011) ***1/2
-An actually really entertaining and funny kids movie, something that hasn't been made in years. Jason Segal brings the most laughs but Amy Adams is pretty funny as well. A couple of weird moments, but overall a strong family movie.

102. Fright Night (2011) ***
-A pretty decent and entertaining monster B-movie with waaaay too much (bad) CGI.

103. The Beatles Anthology (1995) ****
-A fun, interesting 8-hour documentary about the Beatles and their albums. I would have liked to see some more interview footage and less montages/music videos, but still very insightful and entertaining nonetheless.

104. The Tunnel (2011) **
-Basically Blair Witch meets The Descent. Pretty impressively made for such a tiny budget (minus a couple awful green screen shots) but nothing new if you've ever seen a "found footage" movie before.

105. Cursed (2005) **1/2
-A really silly werewolf movie by Wes Craven. It's either really stupid or really brilliant, I can't quite decide. But either way it's a pretty entertaining movie with some really awful CGI.

106. The Girl With the Dragon Tattoo (2011) **1/2
-A pretty all over the place movie with a weak mystery and not much else. Daniel Craig is always good, though.

107. Street Fighter: The Legend of Chun-Li (2009) *
-Somehow worse than the first Street Fighter with Jean-Claude Van Damme.

108. Tucker and Dale Vs. Evil (2010) ***1/2
-An entertaining parody of the "killer in the woods" slasher. A good movie to end 2011 with.