Oh Mamma Mia... here we go (again).
While I’m unfamiliar with the musical and am not a fan of
ABBA by any stretch of the imagination, I thought this could be alright. I like Amanda Seyfried well enough – her voice
sounded lovely in Les Mis. But this
movie... wow. In a midst of cartoonishly
over-the-top acting, terrible songs, and a barely plodding storyling, this
movie just drowns under the weight of its awful.
The songs. Oh God,
the songs. We get the single good song in the movie right at
the beginning (Honey Honey) which was kind of nice of the writers, I
suppose. There are a couple of other
decent ones like the title track and Dancing Queen, but most of the songs are either
complete garbage, or just plain bizarre.
Sometimes both.
The one I remember the most is The Winner Takes It All,
which is maybe one of the worst songs I’ve ever heard. From a jarring chord progression to lyrical
gems such as:
The winner takes it
all
The loser's standing small
Beside the victory
That's her destiny
The loser's standing small
Beside the victory
That's her destiny
Here’s a free tip, songwriters: never use the word “win” in
a song. I don’t know what it is, but it
always sounds childish and stupid. Muse
does it a lot.
Besides the songs we have some awful acting. None of the main cast, they’re all fine, it’s
mostly the two friends of Meryl Streep.
I get that they’re comedic relief, but Jesus Christ they act like they’re
in a 30s serial. I just wanted them to
die, but maybe I had already been tainted by these torturous songs.
The storyline is pretty standard: woman has three suitors
and she’s gotta choose just one. Hardly
the depth of Les Mis or Sweeney Todd, now is it? It wouldn’t be so bad if we cared about any
of the characters, but while most of the cast is alright, nobody elevates the
script enough to make you care about anyone.
And that sums up Mamma Mia pretty well: I just didn’t care
about any of it (other than when I was being bombarded with godawful music).
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